Chasing The All Mighty Dollar

I want to be financially independent and self-sufficient.  Like everyone else on the planet.  Money is a necessary evil in this world.  My mindset however has changed in recent years.  Growing up I always wanted to be rich (but never famous), and while that would be nice, now I’m more concerned with just having enough money in the bank that I don’t have to worry so much about it.

I want a steady stream of income.  But more importantly, I want to be able to enjoy my life.  I don’t want to spend my every waking moment working for money, because that’s going to shortchange the truly important things in my life.  My daughter, my hobbies, becoming more self-sufficient in other ways, the things I really and truly love. 

I grew up in the 80’s and 90’s when everything was about what you had…the best car, best TV, best house…and bigger was better.  It was all about consumerism, and unfortunately, I was at my most susceptible at that point.  Too young to really understand what those messages meant, and definitely too young to understand how it would work out in my life.  Plus there was the message at home that we never had enough money.  I missed out on a lot during my childhood because of that.

I no longer want to keep up with the Jones-es, and frankly, they’re up to their eyeballs in debt.  Right now, $1000 sounds like a pretty big chunk of change to me, even though realistically that doesn’t go very far in today’s world.  I make less then that now.  Millions sound unattainable but heavenly.  My dream right now is 200 acres of land or more, a big house, a decent car (and a 4 wheel drive vehicle) and just what I need to take care of my family in the way they should be taken care of. 

My family is my wealth, not how many dollars I have in the bank.  The memories I create with them are priceless.  Knowing that I’m doing what I can to take care of my family the best way possible makes me happier then a check or deposit.  Money doesn’t make me happy anymore, nor does the stuff I can buy with it.  At least most of it.  There are some things that money can buy that would make me very happy indeed.

Above Photo By sxc.hu user dspruitt

Photography

One of my goals this year is to take my photography to the next level.  Among many other things, of course.
Sheer honesty time, the only camera I use is my Kodak EasyShare C813. It’s the only digital camera I own.  I also have no photo editing skills.  All the photos I’ve posted have been straight off the camera, and I’ve never figured out how to use the onboard editing tools either.  I know how to do the very basics, as in resize, crop, sharpen…but other then that, nothing.  And I know literally nothing about Photoshop.  I don’t even own Photoshop, as amazing as that might sound.

Obviously, there is a large amount of gaps in photography for me.  And if there is one thing I cannot stand, its gaps in knowledge.  While the C813 is a good little point and shoot I think, there is so much that annoys me about it.  For one thing, even with ISO changes, it takes horrible night shots.  And there is nothing I love to take a picture of more then the moon on..well…anything.

I’m looking at (and have added to my honkin Amazon Wish List) one of these bad boys.  From what I’ve read, it looks to do everything I need it to.  It’s the Nikon D3100, though the D7000 looks real purty too.  But considering I’ve never owned a DSLR before, and I’ve only played with my Dad’s Canon Rebel XTi.  So I really have very little experience with working with a camera like this, but I know it will do far more then my puny C813.  I also debated getting one of Canon’s DSLRs, but I love how Nikon’s photos come out straight off the camera.

I’m a bit of a photo junkie, and while I take semi-decent photos with my C813, I really want to expand my world.  Which means its time to save up for a decent camera, some good editing software…and actually learn how to use both.

What camera do you use?  And do you Photoshop/edit your photos?

My House Is Mine Again!

Oh how exciting, the boys are gone!  Now I can get back to the business of living, writing and damn, cleaning.  My house is completely trashed from their two week stay…its amazing what three kids can do compared to one.  And I just didn’t have the energy to stay on top of it, so really its my fault.  This Momma does not do good on very little sleep, let me tell you, especially not when its sudden.

I can say with heartfelt sincerity that I will NOT do this again.  In my current place and where I’m at in life, it’s just too much.  Way too damn much.  There really isn’t any room for them here, and my house is definitely not childproof, although I tried before they showed up.  Nothing like a couple of toddlers to show you where you messed up!

No matter how cute they are.  During the day, fine…overnight once or twice okay.  But for two weeks straight?  Nuh uh, not happening.  I’m too old for that.

Oh, and that “big” snow storm we were supposed to get?  4 whopping inches.  Of course it did change to freezing rain, with some thunder and lightning action.  That’s twice in the past two years there has been thunder and lightning during the winter…something I never saw before as a kid growing up here.  Never.  The closest I had ever gotten to lightning during the winter was the glow of the shocks we received any time we touched anything…got to love static electricity.  Not.

It started out so pretty too.

Oh Summer, How I Miss You

I hate winter.  I despise cold.  Yet I live in Maine.  Smart move eh?  Considering I was born and raised here, you would think I wouldn’t mind the cold so much.  You would think wrong, anything below 75 is considered cold to me.  And considering how broke I am right now, my thermostat never gets that high.  Oil prices are insane folks!

By the end of January, I’m dreaming of warm weather, budding trees and gardening.  Did I mention that I live in Maine?!  I won’t see that until April, unless we are exceedingly lucky and it warms up in March (which is a winter month people!).

Currently it’s a balmy 34 degrees outside, the sun has been shining all day…until about an hour ago.  Yup, you guessed it, there is another storm coming our way.  The Daughter is thrilled…me not so much.  Especially with how warm it is, that means lots of heavy, sticky snowman snow.  Ugh.  And guess who gets to do all that shoveling?  That’s right, me.  With my herniated disc and nerve damage.  I hate winter.

Of course, on the upside…I don’t have to deal with tornados, hurricanes, poisonous animals and any number of horrid things.  It’s a trade off I guess.  Which will make me feel better come spring and summer, but not right now.  Because its cold, dreary, and basically I’m utterly miserable.

Doesn’t help that I’m stuck inside taking care of two extra children, and my patience is seriously gone.  I love my nephews, but I’m so done with being their “Momma.”  Are the gypsies still buying children?  Because I think I could get a good price for these two…although they might request a refund for sheer whininess.  They’re cute as a button when they aren’t fussing their small diaper laden butts off.  Which isn’t often, because both kids came to me sick.

Which got The Daughter sick.  Not like she needed help in that department, with an extremely compromised immune system.  Apparently none of us thought this through too well.  And the medication she is on makes her extremely moody, as well as excessively hungry and blowing up like a balloon on a helium tank.  I want my mostly well mannered child back, instead of this screaming banshee from the depths of hell she has become.

This though, this makes my heart sing a little bit.  My goofy girl is still in there somewhere.  Just a lot harder to find these small moments now.

My First Year As A Freelance Writer

Sucked.  Enough said.  I made some money, but not nearly enough to get me off the state’s teat.  Granted, a lot happened in my personal life last year that needed my full attention, so I’m not kicking myself too hard.  Family comes first, which is the main reason I’m exploring freelance writing.  There were a lot of lessons learned in the past year though.  There is nothing like starting your own business to make glaringly obvious your faults and weaknesses.  Freelance writing is no different, it strips you bare to the forces of nature that surround you and leaves you bleeding and broken in the small moments of calm.

Lesson One: You have to have time management skills.  I’m not talking about being able to make it places on time.  You really need a strong background in time management, because there are way too many distractions, unless all the writing is done in a vacuum.  There always be a phone ringing, housework to do, kids screaming bloody murder for attention, family members pressing you to help them with this or that, or a myriad of other things.  It never ends, and somehow you need to figure out how to get some writing done.  Which leads me to my next hard learned lesson.

Lesson Two: Murphy’s Law hates you.  For those few souls who are unaware of what Murphy’s Law is (and for that I might just have to seriously hurt you), Murphy’s Law states basically that whatever can go wrong, will.  Get comfortable with Murphy, he’s going to become your best friend.  Be prepared for all your goals to go flying out the window regularly due to a major catastrophe, and it will be one that allows you NO writing time and requires your full attention.  And usually will cause you to be running around like a chicken with its head cut off, living off of nicotine, caffeine and a distinct lack of sleep.

Lesson Three: Be prepared to work your ass off.  Unlike a regular job where you clock in and get paid whether you goof off, socialize or bum around, if you don’t do the work, you don’t get the money.  There is no “safety net” of pay, you don’t get paid to show up.  Nor will you get rich quick, frankly you’ll be lucky if you make enough to barely scrape by.  Especially if lesson one and two come into play.  Being a freelance writer isn’t for the faint hearted and shy.

There were more lessons learned, but those are my top three that I will be working with this coming year.  Yes, I definitely plan to continue to grow my freelance business.  I love the work, and it allows me to stay home with my daughter.  Honestly, that’s far more important to me then the money I have or don’t have in the bank.  Unfortunately, the joy of being home all day doesn’t pay the bills, so its back to working my tail off.  After the boys leave.  I’m not that insane yet.  I have financial goals this year, as there are some major things I wish to save up for, like a new place that ISN’T falling down around my ears, summer camp for The Daughter, and maybe eventually a car that isn’t going to break down on me every time I turn around.

So we go back to lesson three: work my ass off.  Here’s to a better 2011!

Above photo by sxc.hu user Nicole N

Looking Through My Daughter’s Eyes

Apparently my daughter thinks my stories of growing up are actually interesting.  Who knew?  I sure didn’t, until she asked a question and we started talking about some experiences I had when growing up.  Talk about a shocking revelation, my daughter actually thinks I’m interesting!

She’s almost 8, which to me seems to be a magical time when your parents are still interesting people.  She also finds humor in things I didn’t at her age, and it was fun to relate some old stories of myself at that age and listen to her laugh with joy.  Of course there were a few moments where I felt rather…aged…as apparently such things are not done today.  But she rather enjoyed listening to my bygone days, and I have the feeling there will be many more questions about my growing up years.

Some play time with my daughter and two nephews. Good fun!

Now its time to go back to the land of screaming babies that aren’t mine.  I need a nap…

My Life - Sheer Insanity

Yup, my life is pretty stinkin crazy lately.  It all started last September, when my Mom had her car accident.  That started the never ending running around to the hospital, grocery shopping for Dad and basically taking care of my family.  Queue October, when Mom dies due to a local hospital (who shall remain nameless) who suffocated her.  Nice eh?  That increases the insanity, plus we are entering into the holidays.  Nothing has gone even semi-right for this family since September, and as the "responsible" one (which is highly debatable) I'm the one left holding the bag.

So what do I do when all this insanity hits?  Curl up under my covers and cry?  Hell no, I decide that I'm going to live my stupid life the way I want to and everyone else be damned.  Which will start shortly after my nephews leave my place of residence, because yes I got lured into being the "helpful" one yet again.  Does that mean that life is miraculously going to get better?  Probably not, at least not in this family.  Especially with the endless rounds of doctor's appointments the Daughter needs now.  She was diagnosed with autoimmune hepatitis in January, after the poor kid turned yellower then the sun.

I have goals for this year, which not surprisingly haven't really been touched since the beginning of January.  I've been too busy reacting to act.  But once these trolls...I mean children...leave, its so on!  After I spend a day or two recuperating from the THREE weeks I will have had them if all goes to plan.  Someone save me now please?  Anyone want a nearly one year old?  He's free for the taking, and I'll send some headache meds with you when you go.  Trust me, you'll need them...he's a fusser and screamer.  I think I've had a permanent headache for the past three days.

Anyone want to change places at least for a day or so?